Fun via. Demetri Martin

"once upon a time

is the best way to start a fairy tale

because those kinds of stories happen upon a time

they don't happen "for a" time or "in a" time or "at a" time.

if you are somewhere and you seem to be upon a time, then pay attention

because you are probably in a mythical situation."

I'll be original tomorrow.
Also, pray that I find my green metal bible. It is missing in action.